Hawthorn Page 8

  “You have that look on your face again,” Liam says. He slips his fingers through mine and warmth flares in my chest. I’m still getting used to all the touchy feely. “Tell me what’s been going on.”

  I start with the first day, the armoire and the giggle, and I take him through every moment of strange happenings, ending with the messed up dream and Danny’s fear. I tell him about Jen and the village rumour and superstition. He listens carefully. When I finish, he sighs.

  “You know, someone, somewhere, once said, ‘Once you eliminate the impossible, whatever remains, no matter how improbable, must be the truth.’”

  “I think that was Arthur Conan Doyle.”

  “Probably.”

  “We don’t have mice.”

  “Okay, you checked one wardrobe. What about the loft?”

  I sit up. “I never thought of that.”

  “Yeah, there could be mice, bats; all sorts.”

  “You’re really making me want to go up and look,” I say sarcastically

  He laughs.

  “Okay. Say we do find mice, or bats, or whatever, that doesn’t explain the voices, or the nightmares, or the reflection.”

  “But stress can. You know that the mind can play tricks on us, and you have that nightmare after this girl Jen told you the story about your aunt and the little people. It was probably in the back of your mind.”

  Yep, Liam reads a lot and has a particular interest in psychology. “Okay, but what about Danny?”

  “Danny is a little boy whose twin sister has decided she’d rather play with an imaginary friend than with him. He always shared a room with her, didn’t he?”

  “Yeah?”

  “Well, sleeping alone takes some getting used to, and if you do have mice, or whatever, the noise could easily disrupt his sleep.”

  I sigh. He’s right, these are all possible explanations. To be honest, they make me feel a whole lot better.

  “Gemma, what happened when we were young, the voices you heard, don’t you think they could have been things you’d picked up from overhearing stuff? I mean, your dad was cheating on your mum; you could have heard him talking to the other woman on a phone or something.”

  “It’s possible. I don’t really remember. It’s all kind of fuzzy now. It was so long ago.”

  He reaches out and smoothes my hair, then cups my face. “You are not going nuts. I promise.”

  I lean into his hand and then he is leaning into me. Our faces are close. Closer than they have ever been before. I can hear my heart beating really loud in my ears because I know he is going to kiss me. My first kiss and I don’t know what to do. But then it doesn’t matter because we are kissing. His lips are on mine and it feels wonderful.

  He breaks the kiss and runs the pad of his thumb across my lips, which are throbbing and tingling.

  Then we burst out laughing.

  The loft is hot and dusty and smells like old stuff, plus it’s huge. It spans the whole of the upper floor and I wonder if Jules and mum realise what potential there is up here. Once all the boxes and trunks are cleaned out, that is, because it is filled with stuff.

  “Keep your eyes peeled for droppings,” Liam says.

  “Nice.”

  There is no need for a torch because the loft has lights; two bare bulbs fixed to beams that we switch on. The light is enough for us to examine the contents of a couple of boxes. I find moth eaten clothes that look like they belong in a BBC period drama, gloves and handbags and parasols. There are piles of books with yellowing pages and tons of little objects. I think of Jen’s mom’s shop. Maybe I can get her to come have a look. There may be some stuff she’d like for the shop. I make a note to ask mum and Jules about it.

  “Hey, look at this,” Liam says.

  “You found droppings?”

  “No, even better.”

  “Better than droppings? Wow, you’re spoiling me.”

  He chuckles. “Seriously, I think you’ll like this.”

  I climb over a couple of boxes to get to him. He’s kneeling by an open suitcase. I peer over his shoulder. He is holding a book open. It is filled with curly, loopy, girly writing.

  A diary.

  “Whose is it?”

  He flips to the front. “Um, it says Bea. L.”

  The front door slams.

  I take the diary. I’ll have to read it later. “Come on, let’s go face the music.”

  27

  JULES

  The kids are tucked up in bed and Liam and Gemma are up in her room with the door open, of course. He’ll be sleeping in Danny’s room in a sleeping bag once he’s ready to call it a night. Yet if I know anything about young love, and I know a little, it’ll be late before they finally decide to turn in.

  The television is on low and Mary is watching some documentary about animals. She’s back at work tomorrow, which is Monday, with a long commute, so I’ll be mum from now on, working from home and keeping an eye on the kids. Not so different from back in the city, but different enough. The kids will be back at school in a few days too, and I have to say, I’m looking forward to the solitude, the chance to just sit and write without having to get up and get one of the twins a drink or a snack or a plaster for a cut.

  “What are you thinking?” Mary asks.

  I turn to face her on the sofa. In that moment I am completely and utterly content. “Will you marry me?”

  28

  GEMMA

  It’s been a long day, but I don’t want it to end. Mum was surprisingly calm about Liam visiting and Jules’s wink told me that it would be okay. I have him for another day and I intend to make the most of our time together. Just having him here with me makes all the little things that have happened seem minor, makes my worry seem childish.

  We are sitting, backs against the bed, arses on the rug. He’s looking at me in that soft way that tells me he is going to kiss me. The door is open and either mum or Jules could walk in at any moment, but I don’t care. I really don’t care.

  I lean into him and he places his lips against mine and the world melts away.

  29

  DANNY

  Gemma’s got a boyfriend! Yuk! I’m tucked in bed, staring out the window. Gemma left the curtains open for me. I like to look at the sky ‘cos here in the country you can see the stars most of the time and there are so many. I tried counting them, but I always fall asleep. Liam’s gonna sleep on my floor tonight. That makes me happy ‘cos I know that they won’t bother me for sure then. I don’t know if Gemma believes me, you know. I think she thinks I’m ’magining them. It’s so frustrating – mum says I’m frustrating sometimes ‘cos she doesn’t understand me. Heather understands me, at least she used to before they came along. I think they’re tricking her. I tried to tell her, but she wouldn’t listen, she got cross at me and told me to piss off. I was gonna tell mum she used a bad word, but then Jules said we were going on the rollercoaster and I forgot.

  I’m sick of being scared all the time. But I’m five now. I’m a big boy so I’m not going to be scared anymore. If they bother me I’ll tell them to get lost, bog off. I’ll use the F-word or the B-word. I won’t be scared anymore.

  “Danny?”

  I sit up as Heather climbs up into bed beside me.

  “What’s up?” I try acting all cool like I’m not surprised that she’s in my room. She hasn’t been my friend for ages. She’s been mean and nasty, but I still love her. I want her to be my best friend again.

  She bursts into tears so I hug her. Her tears make my pyjama top wet. I don’t care, she can even snot on it if she wants. I don’t mind because she is hugging me and I know it’s going to be okay.

  “Elsa’s gone. I can’t find her anywhere. I… I don’t think she’s coming back.”

  I’m happy, so happy, but I can’t tell her that because it’ll make her cross so I squeeze her tight and say, “It’s going to be okay, you have me.”

  She squeezes back.

  Yep, everything is going to be okay. />
  PART 2

  “…I am but the queen of fair Elfland,

  And I’m come here for to visit thee.

  “But ye maun go wi me now, Thomas,

  True Thomas, ye maun go wi me…”

  Child Ballad 37

  30

  GEMMA

  The canteen is packed as usual, the place where everyone goes in between classes, or to dodge classes, in my case. It’s to kill time until the last bus. I have my biology assignment spread out in front of me, a can of Coke and enough distraction to keep me from actually achieving anything.

  “Just put it away,” Jen says. “Makes you look…geeky.”

  “Geek is so hot.” Patrick winks at me and I can’t help but blush, even though I know he’s joking.

  Stephen laughs. “Aw, look she’s gone all shy.”

  “Piss off, Stephen,” I say as I stuff my notepad and pens back into my backpack.

  “Hey!” Eloise waves from across the canteen and then weaves her way toward us, a huge grin plastered on her made-up face. Eloise has a strict, no makeup, no short skirts kinda mum. She gets to college early every day and spends half an hour in the loos applying her makeup and changing into a new outfit. I honestly think that if her mum just loosened up a bit, Eloise wouldn’t bother with the trowel of foundation she smears on every day. She’s a pretty girl, she honestly doesn’t need it.

  Stephen leans back and grabs a chair from the table behind us. It squeaks and scrapes across the linoleum floor. Eloise reaches us and plops herself down in the chair.

  “Thanks, babe.” She pecks Stephen on the cheek and then wipes the lipstick mark off with the pad of her thumb.

  “So, where are we having it?” she asks.

  I roll my eyes. They have been on at me for days now. Party, party, party. I tried to tell them that a party at my house would be boring, but they won’t give up.

  “Trust me,” I say, “we’re better off dressing up and going trick or treating.”

  Eloise laughs “Yeah, well that’s not gonna happen, not in Learmonth.”

  I glance at Jen who winces. “Yeah, Learmonth doesn’t do Halloween.”

  I stare at her, uncomprehending. “What do you mean they don’t do Halloween?”

  Stephen leans in. “The veil between worlds is thinnest on All Hallows’ Eve. Dressing up and going out is courting disaster, baiting them.” He wiggles his fingers in the air.

  Stephen, Patrick and Eloise are all from the neighbouring village of Elder, and it seems Learmonth and its weirdness is common knowledge in these parts. In fact, as far as I’m aware, Jen and I are the only people from Learmonth attending the college. Jen says that most of the local kids go much further afield to study, as if to get away from the thick, suffocating atmosphere of the village.

  “People vanish,” Eloise says.

  “Really?” Patrick perks up. “Do tell…”

  “I don’t know. It’s what they say.”

  “Ah, the infamous ‘they’.” Patrick smirks and Eloise whacks him on the arm. He pouts, pretending to be hurt, but in the next moment he’s grinning. I think Patrick has a thing for Eloise. From the look on Stephen’s face, he may think so too. It’s such a typical scenario; boy falls for best friend’s girl and all that, but it makes me sad because, really, Eloise should be with Patrick. If only Patrick had plucked up the courage to ask her out a few weeks ago instead of hiding behind his humour. He is the flirting king when it comes to girls he doesn’t really fancy, but with Eloise it’s different, as if a layer has peeled back and you get a peek of the real Patrick.

  I slip back to the conversation, abandoning my thoughts. They’re still on about the taboo of Halloween and Learmonth. I’ve had enough because the whole thing is ridiculous and I tell them so, “You can’t ban Halloween. I will not have the twins’ fun crushed because of a few superstitious minds.”

  “Look, if you want the Halloween experience, they’re gonna have to come to Elder ,” Patrick says, “and we can party. I mean, what are the villagers gonna do? Ban you from celebrating your birthday?”

  He has a point, but I know mum. “My mum’ll never go for it. A bunch of teenagers in her perfectly arranged home? No way.” I laugh humourlessly.

  “What about the cottage?” Jen asks.

  I glare at her. The cottage is supposed to be our secret. I never did tell mum about it, but we go up there from time to time, Jen and I, to chill. We’ve made it our own, with knick-knacks and throws. The cupboards are stocked with food and drink. Jen even brought a horse shoe for the front door as a joke. It’s become our place.

  I have to admit, though, I look for signs of Sam each time we go, but I haven’t seen him for ages. I can’t help but think that telling him I have a boyfriend scared him off. Maybe he was hoping to get off with me, and finding out I have a boyfriend put him off. I can’t help but feel pissed off about that. I thought we were going to be friends. It’s weird because I hardly know him, but I miss him. I guess some people leave more of an impression than others.

  “Gemma? The cottage?”

  I sigh. I do so badly want a party with all my new friends. I miss that. I remember the sneaky ciggies and the alcopops we used to sip at the London parties. Mum would have had a fit if she knew, but I was always careful not to get wasted.

  “Fine, but we need to keep it small.”

  Stephen and Patrick exchange looks that instantly make me regret my decision, but it’s too late. The notepad is out and Jen is making plans.

  I glance over and the list is already twenty people long. “Small, Jen!”

  She bites her bottom lip and scribbles down another name.

  “No way!” I snatch the pen off her and scratch out the name

  She laughs.

  “Is Liam gonna make it?” Eloise asks.

  I can feel Jen’s eyes on the side of my face like hot lasers, but I keep my eyes on Eloise.

  “I hope so,” I say.

  Thinking about Liam makes my tummy hurt, so instead I turn my mind to the lie I will have to tell mum to get away with the night…

  We are at the lockers, grabbing our coats when, “Oh god, here he comes,” Jen whispers in my ear before slamming her locker closed. She leans against it with her arms folded across her chest.

  I take a deep breath, clench and unclench my fists, before turning to face him.

  “Hey, beautiful. So how about a ride on my bike?”

  He’s asked me the same question every day for the past two weeks and I’ve given him the same answer every day. It doesn’t seem to deter him. Justin Walker, striking because of his silver-white hair and pale blue eyes, but aside from that he’s like a persistent rash that no amount of steroid cream will shift. It makes me itchy just thinking about it and, man, I tried being nice, I tried being rude, I even tried ignoring him, but he keeps coming back for more. I have no more moods in my repertoire and no more patience.

  “I’m not gonna shag you, Justin, I’m really not interested. Go find someone else to annoy. Seriously, you’re coming across desperate now. That cannot be good for your rep.”

  The smile on his face freezes then falls. “Fine, it’s a bet, okay. Aaron bet me I couldn’t get you onto my bike.” He folds his arms across his chest and leans back against my locker. “I honestly didn’t think it would be this hard, fucksake. It’s just a motorbike ride. Girls like that shit, right?”

  Aaron’s in my art class; arrogant, annoying and up himself; and an eavesdropper. A couple of weeks ago Freya, another girl in my class, and I were talking about cars and I told her how I was scared of motorbikes.

  Jen snorts. “Not Gemma. She’s got a kinda phobia.”

  He stares at me incredulous.

  I throw up my hands. “What? I don’t like the idea of travelling on something that fast without a friggin’ seatbelt, okay?”

  He shakes his head. “Fine, okay, I give up.” He pushes off the locker and drops me a salute. He’s about to turn away when I have an idea.

  “How
much?”

  “What?” He cocks his head.

  “How much was the bet for?”

  “Fifty quid. Why?” He studies my face. “Oh…”

  We agree on a 30/20 split. After all, I’m the one facing a fear, right? That money will come in handy. I need some new pieces for my goodie box.

  He’s waiting for me outside the building. It’s a small community college catering for the town and surrounding villages, but it feels like London with its new redbrick and clean cut lines. The past few weeks I’ve found myself spending more and more time in the town, coming in early and leaving on the last bus back. Despite being in Learmonth for almost two months, it still doesn’t feel like home. Jules said it’ll take much longer than that. Mum says once we celebrate our first Christmas there it’ll start to feel like home.

  “You sure about this?” Jen whispers.

  I nod. I can see Aaron from the corner of my eye, his blonde hair covered by a black and green beanie hat. He stands with a small group of guys that I recognise, but don’t really know. His hands are pushed into his jacket pockets and his breath plumes in the air. His dark eyes watch me with interest, but I am too busy psyching myself up to go over to the huge black and red beast that glares at me, daring me to approach. Justin lifts his visor and shoots me a cocky smile which I know is for Aaron’s benefit.

  I give Jen a quick hug. “See you tomorrow.”

  I stride toward the bike, my back pack slung over my shoulder, and take the spare helmet he offers. It’s a tight squeeze but I get it on and flip down the visor, not wanting anyone to see the fear in my eyes as I sling my leg over the bike.